Category: Jacksón Smith

18 Reasons the CMS Track and Field Team Could Have Gotten Disbanded

Brought to you by capital-J Journalists

 

 Look, we get it. Everybody fucks up once in a while. But it takes a lot to get your whole team suspended indefinitely. So what could have happened this weekend that actually caused the CMS Track and Field team to get temporarily shut down? Step aside, TSL, and let the capital-J Journalists do some investigative
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Dear Student Life, Cease and Desist

From Infringing Our Funny Patent

 

 On February 3rd, the Golden Antlers informed the Student Life of their grievous behavior on February 3rd, 2018. Our request is simple: cease and desist from all funny business.  RE: Cease & Desist from Infringing Our Funny Patent Dear Student Life: We are writing you this letter to document a period of unrelenting infringement of
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AI RANKS OUR RESUME BEST IN SCHOOL

But actually, we are the créme de le créme of CMC’s pre-professionals

 

 Recently, in perhaps the most CMC-y development of all time, the Career Services Center has introduced VMock – a cutting edge artificially intelligent big data bot that will read over your resume, give it a score out of 100, and tell you that you need more action verbs.  While we appreciate the fact that Career
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