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    Thanks, Scripps Core: I am Now Woke.

     

     Now, I know what you’re thinking: you did three whole semesters of Core at Scripps College, so you can never be offensive! And I’d reply to that with “yes, you are exactly right.” Scripps College core has really taught me so much and I confidently can now call myself woke. Like first semester when we […] More

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    CMC Adds Networking Trip to Juarez, Mexico

     

     EDIT: The Golden Antlers deeply regrets the insensitivity in this article. We now recognize the mistake we’ve made in making light of such a fraught a disgraceful problem. We acknowledge that in using the plight of Juarez in this light hearted joke, we are willfully ignoring the role American border and immigration policies play in […] More

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    It’s October! You know what that means…Claremont Ghosting Season

     

     You’ve heard of cuffing season. Now meet ghosting season. You know it’s here by the pumpkin displays at the Hoch and mascara-streaked tears across all 5 campuses. For some students, post-fall break means you’re ready to channel raw family issues into your fear of commitment. What better means could there be than a seasonally appropriate […] More

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    Brilliant First Year Announces that Southern California is “Really Hot”

     

     BREAKING NEWS — Hailing from Needham, Mass., Pomona first year student Cameron Gilder has a made a miraculous observation, causing his peers’ intellect to pale in comparison. While casually strolling to class on Wednesday, Gilder revealed his glorious discovery: “It’s like, really hot here.” Do not make the mistake of grouping Gilder with the rest […] More

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    A Frank Stream of Consciousness

     

     As investigative journalists dedicated to public service, we here at the Golden Antlers have bestowed it upon ourselves to expose the true nature of Frank’s dining hall at Pomona College (Claremont, CA 91711).  Here is a cesspool where normal human interaction ceases to exist but rather elicits the more carnal side of mankind. The Golden […] More

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    CMC to Remove Controversial Statue of Chilean Dictator Augusto Pinochet

     

     After weeks of furious debate, the Associated Students of Claremont McKenna College, the CMC Board of Trustees, and President Hiram Chodosh have come to a joint agreement for the removal of the infamous 40-foot-tall statue of the late Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet that stands in front of the Hub. Echoing a similar debate at Pitzer […] More

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    Dear The Student Life: Fuck You

     

     March 5, 2018 Dear the Student Life, Fuck you. We here at the Golden Antlers are disgusted by your behavior, actually not disgusted, we’re infuriated by your behavior. We try so fucking hard to get your attention, we’ve written numerous articles and letters addressed to you, we’ve influenced school elections, and we even gave the […] More

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    Grandparent Approved Theses

     

     After 3.5 transformative years at a liberal arts college, you’re excited to write and present the culmination of all of your hard work: your senior thesis. As a Feminist/Gender Studies and English Literature double major, you chose to write your thesis on erotic Lesbian poetry in the 1800s. Naturally. However, the thought of explaining this […] More

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    Pomona First Years Cave and Just Go To Frank

     

     After spending the entire week repeatedly telling themselves and others that they would definitely be eating dinner at Scripps on Thursday, the friend group of three Pomona first years finally admitted at roughly 4:30 that they would probably just end up going to Frank. “We’re serious, we’re really going this time,” Samuel Ko, who only […] More

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    5 Helpful Hints for Navigating Cuffing Season at the 5Cs

     

     Well folks, Valentine’s Day is today and that can only mean one thing—cuffing season is rearing to a close! Time for one last shot to turn in those tube tops for more sophisticated nighttime attire that might just help attract that ‘handsome, nice young man’ your grandmother has been lecturing you about since the fifth […] More

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    18 Reasons the CMS Track and Field Team Could Have Gotten Disbanded

     

     Look, we get it. Everybody fucks up once in a while. But it takes a lot to get your whole team suspended indefinitely. So what could have happened this weekend that actually caused the CMS Track and Field team to get temporarily shut down? Step aside, TSL, and let the capital-J Journalists do some investigative […] More

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