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CMS Football and Water Polo Team take Fight for Relevance to Next Level

 

This Saturday’s Rage in the Cage (or, more accurately, “Rage Inside the Cage Inside the Cage”) event sponsored by ASCMC turned ugly around 10:00 PM when the tournament was cancelled due to an outbreak of violence. What was meant to be a fun, carefree way for CMC jocks who peaked in middle school to relive their glory days quickly devolved into an all-out brawl in which at least one Student Security officer was injured.

The incident allegedly began when a CMS Football player threw a punch at a CMS Water Polo player. “I didn’t know what to do,” said Junior the junior full-back, “I’m not used to that kind of attendance at a sporting event. I freaked out.” Authorities investigating the altercation were able to trace the origins of the fight all the way back to the Pomona Sagehens. Erica Waterhouse, CGU Neuroscience student and proponent of reminding students they play for a DIII team, for God’s sakes, explained, “when you don’t give the Stags a worthy opponent, they’re just going to have to look to each other for that level of challenge.”

Been Tilly ASCMC Student Body President spoke to The Golden Antlers saying, “While I am both surprised and impressed by the CMS Football team’s sudden and unexpected display of athleticism, I cannot condone any face-punching whatsoever.”

With dodge ball deemed too dangerous for liberal-arts-educated students between the ages of 18 and 22, students on campus worry about the future of intramural sports as a whole here at the Claremont Colleges. Luckily, as of this morning ASCMC has not voted to increase restrictions on Intramural Water Polo taking place tonight. That means for the undefeated CMC Student Apartments team the plan is still on: combat boots, brass knuckles, and nunchucks encouraged.

– Clancy Tripp CMC ’15, Sam Pitcavage CMC ’15, and Aseem Chipalkatti CMC ’15

 

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