Local CMC student Brian Waterson ’15 recently divulged in a private interview with Golden Antlers reporters that the deals offered to him by GetPfizer, UnrealPfizer, OrderPfizer, SpecialPfizer, and others were “starting to sound like a pretty good bargain.” “At first I was hesitant,” Waterson explained, “but somewhere around the forty-fifth email I started to think ‘whoa, Brian, can you really afford to pass up TOP SALE!! Vigara for 0.54$?’’ Waterson elaborated, saying that emails addressed to “he who want to satisfy lady dreams big” really spoke to him. “It’s like they read my mind,” Waterson raved, “how else could they possible know how much I desire to ‘not disappoint hungry girl this night’?” Mike Malsed, Assistant Director of Student Technology Services could not be reached for comment as he was too busy making copies of his Social Security Card so that the former king of Cape Town could wire him 10 million US dollars ‘in good faith.’
– Clancy Tripp CMC ‘15
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