Early Tuesday morning in an exclusive interview with Golden Antlers staff member Clancy Tripp, the guy at Liquor Land divulged that he is “really going to miss the Class of 2015.” Said guy reminisced on four years of serving quality, legal alcoholic beverages to Claremont Colleges’ current graduating class. He grew misty-eyed upon recollecting their first cases of Peach André back in 2011 for their very first 6:01 and he waxed nostalgic over the twenty plus cases purchased for this week’s Fountain Party. “It’s just tough, you know?” the Liquor Land Guy admitted, “one day they’re walking in here with an IdChief New York ID saying they’re 22 and paying in cash, and four years later they’re waltzing in with cirrhosis of the liver and a legitimate US identification card because they are actually 22.”
Liquor Land Guy expressed his fervent hope that the Class of 2015 would not “forget who was there for you along the way” to carry Bubblegum UV to the taxi you took to Liquor Land because freshmen aren’t allowed cars on campus, to your sophomore year Fireball phase, to your Junior Year just-got-back-from-study-abroad drink wine out of the bottle phase. “It’s like they say,” the Liquor Land man sniffed as he dabbed at his eyes with a moist Bombay Sapphire Shot Towlette, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
– Clancy Tripp CMC ’15
“saying their 22 and paying in cash”
Looks like someone wrote this after a trip to Liquorland.
Oh no the shaaaaaame…..
I think you meant “cirrhosis” of the liver. Psoriasis is a condition that makes skin flake and itch.