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Jacksón, Senior For Freshman Class Prez

 

The Golden Antlers would like to announce the official Golden Antler’s candidate for Freshman Class President: Jacksón Curtis Smith, senior for freshman class president.

For far too long, Freshman representatives have been running the Freshman class.

In a rare sequence of events, we had a chance to talk to said Jacksón, asking him hard hitting questions like, “What will you do when we rig the election for you?”

As commander in chief of all freshman, Jacksón pledges to:

  1. Immediately Dissolve ASCMC
  2. Cocaine Tuesdays
  3. Cocaine Wednesdays
  4. Make TNC Great Again —  i.e. Cocaine Thursdays
  5. Fuk it, use Freshman budget for cocaine every day of the week

Peace, Love, Capitalism,

Jacksón

Follow @ZeGoldenAntlers on Twitter for our live tweeting of the election and come out to snack at 10:30 PM for the exact same speech Jacksón gave when he was a freshman, now as a senior.

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Phantom of the Slopera

Why the Golden Antlers Hired Me