CLAREMONT—A CMC sophomore who has opted to remain anonymous told Golden Antlers journalists that while walking back to his room in Green Hall one evening earlier this week, he caught a glimpse of a half-naked female resident through the blinds on her windows. “I was just walking past the room like I do every night,” he reported, “and I heard that new Daft Punk song—you know, the one about getting lucky—playing from inside, so naturally I looked up and—holy shit! Boobs!”
The visibly excited Psychology major described the experience as “really awesome,” saying that it had made his night, maybe even his week. When asked if he knew who was in the room, he was unsure. “I’m really bad at identifying someone based only on their breasts. I think some freshman girls live there, though.” Crediting the blinds on North Quad windows for granting him access to the titillating scene, he explained “even when you think they’re closed all the way, if you catch just the right angle you can still see through them—sometimes a few even get stuck open. Jackpot!” Though the view lasted only a split second, he felt it had vindicated his housing choice. “I never saw anything like this living in Auen last year; giving up AC was totally worth it. North Quad for life!”
– Lucas Van Houten CMC ’14
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