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Save The Golden Antlers

 

Dear Golden Antlers readers,

It is with heavy hearts that we announce that the Golden Antlers is facing a serious threat of a total and complete shutdown. Since barely escaping shutdown six years ago, we have been excommunicated from the safety of the consortium governments. We’ve been gasping for air, barely surviving on thin ice. 

Last Monday, we received a phone call from a blocked number. We were connected to a Slack conference call with the presidents of each college, where we were told that they will no longer stand for our defamation of the consortium through so-called “fake news.” 

Though we explained that the Golden Antlers provides the most thorough and trustworthy investigative journalism in Claremont, a conclusion was reached (without our consent) calling for the dissolution of the Golden Antlers unless we can pay for the damages to the college’s reputation attributed to our publication.

The schools are demanding a combined sum of $93,143,512.63 dollars, and due to our lack of oversight of last year’s budget, we’re unfortunately coming up a bit short. We understand that we should have not used the six dollars we accumulated last year to help the Sexy Nigerian Prince that asked us to route $1,000,000 in his off-shore account; in our defense, he told us he really, really needed the money so he could get back home. We are sorry we have empathy, but more importantly, we are sorry that we failed you.

As readers of the Golden Antlers, you deserve the truth and nothing but the truth. But the reality of the situation is that the rich and powerful have complete control of the media, and we lost all of our trust fund baby staff writers years ago.

Despite this hardship, we will not give up. But we can’t do it alone.

We are starting a GoFundMe to pay off our debts. We will use your financial support to continue to provide the top-notch investigative journalism students deserve, provide a platform for our supporters to engage in retaliation with us, and most importantly, show a big “fuck you” to the presidents of the colleges.

As our most reliable supporters, we appreciate any help during these trying times. We are eternally grateful for your dedication to making sure our voices are heard.

With our deepest gratitude,

The Golden Antlers Staff

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