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The Golden Antlers Guide to Being a Good Roommate


Did you know that every member of The Golden Antlers sleeps in the same bed at night? That’s what makes us uniquely qualified to give the rest of you advice on how to cohabitate like a boss. Follow these rules and you and your roommate will be besties for the resties – and if all else fails, there’s nothing that a tender forehead kiss can’t fix. Remember that.

  1. Find your true passion, the marching cymbals 

Your roommate will never have to worry about oversleeping their alarm because they will already be awake, all the time, thanks to you.

  1. Shower As Little As Possible

This way, the shower will always be free when they want to use it! Now that’s what I call accommodating.

  1. Let them know that you might pee the bed

It’s good not to have secrets between friends.

  1. Booby Traps!

Everyone loves comedy! LOL!

  1. Pry.

Ask as many questions as you can! People love to talk about themselves.

  1. Be Vulnerable. Cry Often.

Let’s overcome our generational trauma – together.

  1. Tickle Fight!!!!!!!

Physical touch is one of the five love languages, so it’s cool

  1. The More the Merrier! Bring in the Ants!

Enough said.

  1. Engage in heated political discourse whenever possible

It is always possible.


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