What’s up, dog?! The name’s Mama, Joe Mama. Ha-ha, sorry, I just had to start off with a James Bond quote! I’m going to be writing for the TSL this year, so without further ado, here is my bio for the website:
I’ve spent the last two years at the school of business at Nunya university, right in the heart of Colorado. You might know us by the name of the famous mountain we’re located on Mt. Miface, world-renowned for the amazing feeling that climbers have reported after making the arduous journey to get on top of it. That school was tough and I just HAD to get out of there because, well, you know, it’s Nunya Business. Originally, I am from Sugond, Disdik (for those of you less versed in geography, that’s northern Africa). Just a quick random fact about my hometown, the most famous band to come out of our town is Imagine Dragon! Yes, you read that right. A lot of people confuse it for Imagine Dragons when they hear the name, but our very own Imagine Dragon is a heavy-metal cover band of the famous one and we’re really proud of it. They’ve actually been working on their own music recently, and have just released their first single “Disdik All Up In Your Face”—Imagine Dragon. I recommend you give it a listen!
I’m excited to introduce you all to the intricacies of life in my hometown. I could whip up my favorite dish for you all, Sugandese nuts, or I could teach you the traditional style of dance from my hometown: Chokonma (ask me about the more advanced variations, Chokonma-nuhdts and Chokonma-kok if you’d like)!
I hope you all give me a much better welcome than I got at Nunya. Since they thought I was a stupid foreigner, my “friends” all kept trying to trick me into really stupid stuff that I eventually got tired of. Like they tried to convince me that the Vice President’s name was Sug. No last name, just Sug. I mean, come on, Sug my ass! Like that’s a real name.
My mom’s name is Iyla vDiĉ (she decided to keep her maiden name). My Dad’s name is Tip, and one day I aspire to be a cop like him and wear the same badge that he does:
Tip Mama, Head of Disdik PD
To end this bio on a personal note, I was ridden with the horrible disease known as yore-ahss for the past summer. However, with the help of my doctors, family, and friends, I am happy to say that I have beat yore-ahss, and now I feel like I could beat it a million times over.