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Frost: Definitely-Not-A-Drug-Reference EDM Party
This past week ASCMC and associated students unveiled the most recent attempt to distance the yearly spring EDM party [formerly known as SpaceX, formerly known as White Party] from its reputation as a drug-fueled fuckup-ery. The planning committee behind this year’s event announced the name for this year’s party: “Frost: A 5C EDM Event” which […] More
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Yelp’s Top 6 Places to Cry On Campus
We’re no stranger to YikYak (and whatever tomfoolery you youngins get into these days) and our reporters try to keep up to date to ensure that our readers receive quality, timely pieces. Most recently we noted that many yakkers have expressed concern at a lack of quality places to cry at the 5Cs. We also […] More
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Exclusive: The Golden Antlers Finds an Honest CMC Resume
– Ender Wiggin CMC ’15, Liat Kaplan CMC ’17, Sam Pitcavage CMC ’15, Dante Toppo CMC ’15, Clancy Tripp CMC ’15, and Jack Gerstenberger [do_widget id=bl_google_ads-7] More
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CMS Athletic Department Releases New PE Classes Offered Next Fall
Do you dislike soccer? Are you not into Yoga or Weight Lifting? Do you need more thrill in your life? Then worry no more! Following up on popular hits such as Fly-Fishing and Rock-Climbing, in the next few weeks the Claremont Colleges are expected to publicly unveil the new PE courses that students will be able […] More
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in Brendan Busch, Clancy T, Elliot Warner, GA
The Forum Discovers that Partying Has Turned CMC Students Into Literal Animals
Something is horribly, horribly wrong at CMC, and it looks like The Forum may have found the cause. In the article “Partying Like a Pre-Professional,” one esteemed Forum writer recounts his first-hand experience at TNC. Being the first Forum writer to ever attend one of these events, he was shocked to find that, instead of […] More
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Senior Scripps Student Admits She Still Doesn’t Know What “Patriarchy” Is
Just in time for the spring semester, as both the Classes of 2015 and 2018 begin longing for the simpler days, The Golden Antlers has a story sure to rock students’ preconceived notions harder than a PSU panel discussion on reverse racism. Gabby Mendel ’15 has come forward and admitted that, after three and a […] More
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7 Exciting New Privileges to Check This Semester!
[do_widget id=bl_google_ads-7] – Concept by Clancy Tripp CMC ’15, written by Sam Pitcavage CMC ’15, David Cremins PO ’17, Ben Turner CMC ’16, Dante Toppo CMC ’15, and Haley Patoski CMC ’14 More
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New Study From Pew Research Center Confirms Everyone Is Doing Better Than You
A recently released report from the Pew Research Center, a nonpartisan American think tank based in Washington D.C., substantiated nationwide concerns that everyone is objectively better at life than you. The report was commissioned by the Chronicle of Higher Education to investigate all fourth year students in national, private, and state universities in the continental […] More
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in Author, Clancy T, GA, Jessica Jin, Sam Pitcavage
Golden Antlers Exclusive: Statistics on the Incoming Class of 2019
Dear CMC Class of 2019, Winter break is drawing to a close, you’ve received your acceptance letters, and you’re already looking forward to coordinating shot glasses and bedspreads with your future roomie. Lucky for you we’ve got the inside scoop on what your future classmates are going to be like. We hereby present the official collected […] More
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in Clancy T
5 Fun Winter Cardigans That Might Trick Your Mom Into Thinking You Haven’t Lost Your Virginity Yet
We love this Fair Isle Open Front Cardigan in navy from office-friendly retailer GAP. This cozy fall favorite is 5% alpaca and 100% adorably patterned, which is good because nothing distracts the woman who bore you from the fact that you have become a godless heathen like bold multicolor stripes! Ladies, we’re drooling over […] More
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in Clancy T, Dante Toppo, GA
Golden Antlers Uncovers Unedited Draft of Claremont Independent’s “Fight Club” Article
Thanks to a fleet of undercover spies, The Golden Antlers has uncovered the original draft of the Claremont Independent’s most recent “Fight Club” article. ———- Forwarded message ———- From: Kris Gaaaaaaarder <KGaaaaaaarder15@cmc.edu> Date: 2 December 2014 at 11:20 Subject: Fwd: CI Final Draft of Groupsex Article To: [badge style=”dark”]censored[/badge] Great content guys, really good work. Two […] More
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The Golden Antlers Goes Deep (Oh So Deep) Undercover to Investigate TSL Sex Column
Buried deep (yeah, right there) in the back pages of the Claremont Colleges’ erotic publication The Student Life, a relic from the days of Sex in the City, phone sex hotlines, and grainy VHS pornos lives on with surprising stamina: the sex column. Once considered the highest form of college journalism, the sex column is […] More
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