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    Why I Started Pegging This 2020, and Why You Should Too


     A very close friend of mine who wishes to remain anonymous has recently introduced me to the concept of pegging. I have taken on the challenge of pegging for this new year, and although I’m far from an expert, I believe that the aforementioned friend’s hands-on approach launched me into the world of pegging. While […] More

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    I Keep Seeing Big Bird Everywhere


     I didn’t want to say anything but I’m at a fucking breaking point. Why, on my dear mother’s life, does Big Bird occupy every other inch of this campus. I know I know I know, you’ll say what all my “friends” have been saying to me on repeat, “AJ, that isn’t Big Bird, that’s Cecil […] More

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    TSL Op-ed: I Hate TV and So Should You


     By Alexander Chuckworth Davis III Newsflash America. There is nothing more telling of our moment in history than the popular entertainment and media that is consumed by the people. Future generations of Americans will look back on our era and judge us by what is on TV. And what is on TV these days? Pure […] More

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    TSL Refuses to Publish My Op-Ed on Why Anal Should be the First Base


     It seems that the popular trend of silencing brave voices on campus has officially spread to our friends at TSL. While the shameful newspaper has no qualms with publishing inconsequential pieces on things like the upcoming presidential election and something they call ‘sports,’ they refuse to give a platform to perhaps the most underrated journalist […] More

  • Claremont College, The Student Life, The Claremont Independent
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    Leaked TSL Opinion Piece: Rehashing yet Another Liberal Political Opinion Everyone on Campus Already Agrees With


     By Average Freshman Here’s what I think is a strong political opinion that everyone on campus already agrees with. This is an argument that literally no one thinks is controversial. I don’t need to be writing this article as it is about an issue that is already commonly discussed on campus and in our greater […] More

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    Help! Cecil Got Abs and Won’t Stop Fucking My Roommate!


     To the Pomona Administration and Trustee Board, With Great Urgency:  I am currently embroiled in a crisis with Pomona housing that has lasted almost a month now. I have gotten no response from Housing and Residential life even though I have sent several strongly-worded emails. I am very vexed about this issue and don’t know […] More

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    Scripps College Should be a Safe Space: Remove All Womxn so I Feel Comfortable


     Fellas, we’ve all been there. You’re walking through Scripps College, the women’s college’s campus alone when suddenly, an all-consuming aura of queasiness possesses you. You feel a compelling urge to grab your keys and put them between your knuckles as if you’re Wolverine. You dial 911 on your phone and keep it open, just in […] More

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    Why Can’t I Fuck in the Bouncy House at Pirate Party?


     Pirate Party is a sacred ceremony. A celebration of joy, established in 1348 when Claremont Men’s College was a mere infant of two years, Pirate Party holds eternal sanctity that we must all take full advantage of and bask in. Originally founded as a way to honor CMC’s primary funder and the original flex daddy […] More

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