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    Good News: Standing Room Still Available in LA Hospitals

     

     Due to Covid-19, hospitals in the Los Angeles area are adapting to fit the demand of their services. While many industries have been hit hard by the pandemic, hospitals across the world have proven that they can remain in business despite Covid-19. Hospitals in LA are doing exceptionally well with 100% of the beds in […] More

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    From the White House: “Due to Travel Restrictions, Coup was Hosted at Home This Year “

     

     WASHINGTON, D.C. — On Wednesday, January 6, 2021, alt-right terrorists descended on the nation’s capitol building in a shocking coup nobody saw coming except people who read the news or the people who publicly organized it. While American coups are typically staged overseas or at least a thousand miles south of Washington D.C., Americans are […] More

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    Our Favorite Types of Voter Fraud, Ranked

     

     Ranking criteria: Efficiency (1-10), Creativity (1-10), Morality (1-10); Ranked from worst to best Please play responsibly. The Golden Antlers is not responsible for any voter fraud you may commit. Regular fraud: In this economy!? Efficacy: depends on who you ask Creativity: (0/10) Morality: (3/10) Overall: (1/10) Asking more foreign powers to meddle in the election: […] More

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    Equality Win! Pitzer College Professors Are Now Required to Live With Their Parents

     

     Following increasing pressure from the Pitzer College student body, President Herman Melville Oliver Twist announced three weeks ago that his administration has made the formal decision to require all professors to move back in with their parents. Student activists have been mobilizing all semester to put increased pressure on their college’s administration for this enormous […] More

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    The Golden Antlers’ 2020 Election Endorsements

     

     For a long time (eight years and one week!), we know you have relied on us for all your opinions about everything in your life, and politics is no different. Thus, we have taken it upon ourselves to compile a list of endorsements for those voting in the Claremont area and beyond. Remember, if you […] More

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    Thinking Inside The Box: Are Mimes The Future Of Virtual Learning?

     

     We’ve heard it time and again since the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic: these are uncertain and unprecedented times. Now, months later, little has changed, and students across the country are struggling to adjust to the challenges posed by a completely virtual education system. But there’s one group of students who aren’t worried at all. […] More

  • McKinsey Loves Blacks
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    Op-Ed: Sorry I Haven’t Been Participating in the BLM Movement, My McKinsey Internship is Taking Up All My Time.

     

     By Guest Author Jenna Side, Class of 2021 I want to preface this article with the following: I am absolutely an anti-capitalist feminist. I study at a prestigious liberal arts college that teaches me how to question the world around me and offers exceptional opportunities: that’s how I got this job at McKinsey & Company. […] More

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    Breaking: Match Claremont Exposed as Front for Russian Bots

     

     It is with great fear for our ever-weakening democracy that we, The Golden Antlers, release the alarming news that Match Claremont has been discovered to be a front for Russian bots. Like many other Russian bot Facebook pages, Match Claremont attempted to lure innocent Claremont students into a false sense of security by directly imitating […] More

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    How to Say “Trump is Going to Win” Without Sounding Too Excited

     

     After an excruciatingly long process of the Democratic Party trying to crush any excitement about them, they have finally succeeded; it’s pretty clear that the DNC is pursuing a bulletproof strategy. The party establishment has thrown its weight behind a moderate candidate in order to prevent Karl Sanders from seizing the means of election. That […] More

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    A Letter to TSL

     

     From the Golden Antlers Editorial Board: Dear Claremont community, Over the past several years, we have delighted in the opportunity to provide the community with campus-themed satire, quizzes, and humorous videos. It has been an honor and a privilege to make you all laugh over our half-baked jokes and stupid quips about life at the […] More

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