The 5Cs have unveiled their plans for the Spring 2021 semester due to mounting pressure from students and parents and the idea of losing any more money during the COVID-19 pandemic. Pitzer College plans to have students sleep out on the Mounds in hammocks spaced six feet apart so as to maintain social distancing. “Pitzer […] More
Earlier this week, Scripps College announced that they would move forward in the process of getting rid of all our shit. In a characteristically awful move, Scripps has now forced students to decide between having all of their belongings shipped to their home residence or donated. Fearing for their possessions which have been in storage […] More
Stephanie Miller, SC ’23, knew her Connecticut dogmatism would drastically change the moment she stepped off the plane in Southern California. Never would it have occured to her, however, that a single week in Claremont would transform her political identification from a center-right ponytail into a devout anarchist. She thought–maybe breathing the same air as […] More
Protests erupted as “Rocky Thunder Orgasm,” a show horse from Topeka, Kansas, was escorted from Scripps premises last Thursday after repeated complaints from students. The controversy followed a decision from the Scripps College Office of Admission to admit the horse after Orgasm submitted a “staggeringly high” ACT score of 5, according to Scripps Chief Admission […] More
Fellas, we’ve all been there. You’re walking through Scripps College, the women’s college’s campus alone when suddenly, an all-consuming aura of queasiness possesses you. You feel a compelling urge to grab your keys and put them between your knuckles as if you’re Wolverine. You dial 911 on your phone and keep it open, just in […] More
In retaliation for the Admissions Office not knowing how to create a class that isn’t 100 students above the average enrollment, the Registrar said “Fuck it” in protest to making their lives a living hell. When asked for a statement, the Registrar threw crumpled Major Declaration forms at the Golden Antlers reporters while yelling at […] More
Now, I know what you’re thinking: you did three whole semesters of Core at Scripps College, so you can never be offensive! And I’d reply to that with “yes, you are exactly right.” Scripps College core has really taught me so much and I confidently can now call myself woke. Like first semester when we […] More
CLAREMONT, CA – Campus officials have enacted a new policy restricting acquisition of “Scripps Dad” products to those with proof of biological paternity. The Scripps Dad logo—once an innocent emblem donned in various fabric forms by grieving fathers on move-in day—now serves as a souvenir that male members of the 5C community bring back […] More
Yesterday, the Motley unveiled their new plans to integrate several eco-friendly practices. This plan is to be implemented completely by February 2019, and has received praise from several notable leaders in the environmental justice community including the Environmental Defense Fund, the Citizens Climate Lobby, and that group of Pitzer juniors smoking by the clock tower. […] More
Scripps College Residential Life has managed to creatively solve its persistent housing crisis once and for all in a logical and simple way: by providing Storage Pods for students to live in! Students have been raving about their single-dorm buildings. “My bed almost fits inside, which isn’t that bad of a deal,” Amy Braggard ‘21 […] More
This just in—students have begun protesting the Motley for never having a sufficient amount of drink ingredients to supply the demand of the Claremont Colleges. Students from all around the five campuses have come together to form a picket line that is nearly as long as the line for the Motley itself. Notably, this is […] More
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