Clancy Tripp
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Unsuccessful CMC Pickup Lines

Career Services is hosting a resume workshop. In my bed.
Yeah, I live in Phillips!
Alternately: I am a freshman girl.
Yeah, I’m from Pomona. No, I won’t roofie your drink. Hahahahahaha. Hahahaha.  Haha. Ha.
When you told me you worked for the Rose Institute, something in my pants rose too.
The TNC theme this week is Investment Bankers and Sluts. So yeah, I guess we don’t need to dress up.
“I tried this amazing burger place in the village. We have to go sometimes, the Bacon burger is to die for!”
Ladiesss, I’m packin at least 9 inches over here. What? Dean Vos added 5 to everything, why can’t I?
Let’s khristen the Kube
Just so you know, the Health Educational Outreach offers free STD testing. Let me be your Thursday Night Mistake!
Yeah, I work for the Admissions Office. My official title? Prospie Slayer.
I’m fiscally conservative, socially liberal, and sexually amazing.

– Clancy Tripp ’15

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Anonymoose
November 20, 2012 10:41 am

Ya basically not funny. Epic miss.

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TheGoldenAntlers
November 20, 2012 5:59 pm
Reply to  Anonymoose

Alright, Anonymoose, The Golden Antlers hereby invites you to grow a pair and write something for our publication to prove your hilarity.

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Anonymoose
November 21, 2012 12:08 am

Because my time is best spent churning out CMC-based humour, right?

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Seriouslywhothefucksaysepicafter7thgrade?
November 21, 2012 12:54 am
Reply to  Anonymoose

Wrong! Clearly your time is best spent bitching about it in the comments section like the witty bastard you are. Also, epic pun.

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