Heartbreaking. Another college admissions season has come and gone, and another 17-year-old whose IQ isn’t quite high enough has been rejected from Pomona College. Tragic. Predictable. Luckily, their safety school let them in: Harvard was only too happy to accept the poor dolt not up to snuff for the Harvard of the West (Pomona).
Honestly, it makes a lot of sense. Pomona only accepts, like, 6.6% of applicants. That’s basically no one. That’s one person out of every 5 million (Pomona taught me that). Harvard probably accepts 10% of its applicants or something pathetic like that.
The thing about Pomona College is that it only really accepts the best and the brightest. Any given person you know at Pomona College, they are the very best and very brightest person they know. True story!
Has Harvard ever been ranked #1 small liberal arts school in the country? Doubt it! Because it’s a university and also has a law school and a business school! Take that! Losers.
And Harvard, I mean, it’s an okay school probably. I’m sure it’s fine. But how many former presidential candidates do you think went there? Like, did Marianne Williamson go to Harvard? I don’t think soooo! Plus, we have former Jeopardycontestants!
I honestly just feel bad for this kid. Going to your backup school just isn’t something any Pomona College student can relate to. Going to Harvard just isn’t something any Pomona College student can relate to.
Here is a list of people that would have been rejected from Pomona College: Barack Obama, Matt Damon, JFK, Mark Zuckerberg, T.S. Eliot, Bill Gates, Ted Cruz, JFK, Natalie Portman, and Teddy Roosevelt.
Harvard famously wishes they were Pomona College. They probably talk about us all the time over there.