Co-writer: Jeremy Martin
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Are you sure about that? No, I just think I probably know more about this. I’m not saying you’re unintelligent, you’re just uninformed. You’re probably really intelligent actually, which is – first of all, very endearing – but it’s also why I think you’ll understand what I’m about to explain to you.
Well, to start, have you read any books on the subject? Really? No, that doesn’t sound like one I’ve heard of. You know what, I can just summarize this book I read a while ago. I don’t remember the title, but I definitely read it. It was written by this super cool female author – she totally shares my opinion on the issue. Love her concept, really clever girl, but I do think I have a better way of phrasing it.
We actually talked about this in one of my classes last semester. The professor totally loved me – he and I were lowkey kindred spirits. Maybe I can lend you one of the papers I wrote for that class? Prof said it was one of the best he’s read in a while. He actually encouraged me to do my thesis on it, but I’m not really that interested in the subject, I’m just really good at it. Maybe if you namedrop me you can PERM into one of his classes?
Right, so back to the subject at hand. It’s funny you brought it up because I was just thinking about it during my last J Tree shrooms trip – did you know doing shrooms actually changes your brain chemistry forever? Honestly the government probably made them illegal because they knew we’d realize how fucked up the world is if we were all doing shrooms. Fuck, man.
So anyways, I hope it makes more sense to you now. You should totally trip with me some time. Have I told you that you’re actually quite beautiful? This was super fun. Let’s do this again soon.