Pomona College Heatwave Mitigation Plan: It’s Sundress Season, Ladies!!
Yum! Seal Court Pond Provides Mallott with Delicious Boiled Turtles
Pitzer Student Breaks Down: “It’s too hot to walk around barefoot”
Yes, God Really Has Answered Your Prayers: 3-Inch Men’s Shorts Are So BACK, Baby! Show Us That Pale Upper Thigh, Hot Stuff 😍
Shit: Small, Frail Dog Is Just As Fucked in Your AC-less Dorm as if You Locked It in Your Hot Car
Pomona Student Without AC Secretly Loving Having Something to Complain About
Pitzer Student Struggles to Fry Vegan Egg on Sidewalk
CMC Students Suspiciously Pinker than Usual
SHS Declares Health Crisis as Cases Rise of Malott Popsicles Being Put Where They Do NOT Belong Increases
Celsius Users Out of Weather Small Talk (Their Numbers Just Aren’t Scary Enough)
ASPC Uses Emergency Funds on 3 Ice Cubes, 50 Heat-Study Committees
Did You Know It’s Hot Outside?
Guy Who Loves Weather-Based Small Talk Secretly Having The Time of His Life
Ship of Theseus? Pitzer Pool Now Just Sweat
Claremont Christian Fellowship Rapidly Loses Members: “Hell sounds not too bad right now”
Horny Student Declares They’re “in heat too,” Goons Over Bare Shoulders Showing In Class
SoCal Experiences Record-Breaking Heat Wave. Good Thing We Won’t Have Another One Next Year! Haha. Right? Right guys?
